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(T.P.91.D) The Past 91 Dayz…
December | January | February

When iThink baq oN The Past 91Dayz(TP91D) Ov Ma lyf, wit its many Issues, my mind/Subconscious Keeps takin me baq to tha opening line ov Charles Dickens’ classic novel.

“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the Season of belief, it was the season of Doubt, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair”
Charles Dickens,aTale oF Two Cities

Tha Past 91Dayz(TP91D) wer dayz Ov many contradictions 4me, & truth be told, D gr8st contradiction iFound was within myself.

iAv always been something of a “Jack Ov All Trade” Character, Ov Which none of which is truly me. iN No tym has this been more obvious than this past 91Dayz oV ma lyf, Cos iLived this dayz More Reckless and disjointed than ever B4 (Xcept April 2010 Obviously) but somehow at peace with myself for iAv come to terms with what iYam.

Seeing Hw Tha Past 91Dayz “TP91D” was such aDismal Tym 4me, iYam Xtremely glad Dat TP91D Did Nt even nearly meet the poor standard set by its predecessor. However, it did make several attempts. On the other hand TP91D was full of blessings 4Me & iWuld be the worst sort of fool not to count them.

iT was the best of times.

iFell iN love During TP91D… & iHad quite aNumber of Lovely ppl Fall iN Love wit me. Der were Lots of great moments many of which iWould Never 4get.

iT was the worst of times.

The Person iFell iN Love Wit Did Nt feel the same way abt me… & iDid Nt feel d same abt d Odas that loved me. Sadly, Sometimes iWish iDid.

iT was the age of wisdom

iFound Out a lot of new Tinz iN aVery short time + iYam still oN Ma Journey to Attain Some piece oF paper iN tha Uni 2tell Me Hw Smart iYam / supposed to be.

iT was the age of foolishness

Dis is something no piece of paper can tell me cos iT Always say “A” or “B” or “C As Ma Grade iN Xzamz but iAv learned 2Accept iT Has aFact that ————-» My Poor Memory iS gradually becoming more & More of an issue. But I’m Glad my ability 2Reason remains Undiminished. Also, iFinally realized Dat iWill Never knw as much as iYam xpected to. Or want to,

iT was The Beginning Ov Belief

iRealized Dat iDo Believe iN God More Dan iActually Care are 2Admit + for some reason, iYam very reluctant 2Talk abt Ma Faith Bcos iLike 2pretend 2B aGuy oF strict Logic. Bt Wen Der Was No Bar, I know whom I call to for help.

iT was aSeason oF Disbelief

iCan count on my fingers, D number of tym iWent 2church During TP91Dz. iYam Constantly Amazed @ the ability Ov ppl 2Twist religion 4 their own agendas. Sadly, iAv No faith left iN Most oF D religious structures So iNstead iChose 2 Focus oN Charity & Karma.

iT Was D season oF Light

iMade Many New Friends During TP91Dz, Nd iAv Learned loads oV New Tinz Abt Ppl, Friendship, Character Nd Trust cc: @ShigoD, @Sasha_Pee @oYeMyKke @Demola & @loyalSimeon.. Some Ov Good & Impressive Character While Some…. *Sigh* (S/o to Ma #IB Connect @Papi, @GodSon & @DarkMayor Yu Guyz Are OnPoint). iTraveled 2Many New Places, iHad several New Experiences, Nd Opened Myself Up more Dan iEva Had. S/o To “Lightz” Dat helped me Navigate my way Through Dark tymz cc: “RYT” GodGoMakeYouBigger..!!!

iT Was The season Ov Darkness…

iRealized Dat Asides Ma Folks, Ma Sisterz And aFew Frndz Dey Are Nt loads Ov Ppl That Can Be Trusted completely… The Rest Are just Emotional Minefield oV Love, jealousy. Hate, Rage And Hidden Agendas Dat iYam Nt Eager 2Navigate…Maybe Cos iDnt Really Give a Toss..

iT Was  The Season Ov Hope

iSpent Many Days During TP91Dz Hoping For Many Thingz, Some Ov Which iEventually Received Nd iYam Xtremely Gr8ful 2God For. Nd Also Some Ov Which iYam Still Hoping/Waiting For…

iT Was aSeason Ov Despair… *sigh*

Was iT Really..? No iT Wasn’t. No iT Fuckinq Wasn’t. Bcos iNever Really Lost hope. iFelt Overwhelmed, Sad, Angry, Frustrated, Stressed, Buh iNever Sank iNto Despair & iDoubt iEva Will. TP91Dz Tried Really Hard To Break Me, Wer Death & Desolation Tried & Failed, Stress & Uncertainty Tried Even Harder. The Troubles @Home Combined Wit D Cruel, Constant and Consistent Stress oV Labors Imposed oN Me By Ma Uni Combined Wit d Ups & Downs oV My Emotions All Conspired 2Break Me. Bt Dey Failed…. 😀
I’m Nt just Writing Dis 2Make Dis Seem Lyk aStory Wiv aHappy Ending… Dos Dat Knw Me, Knw Wat iMean. I’ve Gotten Most Ov Wah iWanted Out oV TP91D

iYam Glad 4 D Life iAv & d ppl Dat Wer Part Ov iT Dis Year. iWuld Mention Ur Names iF iWere AnyLess Ov aSecretive Person. But D Truth iS Yu Already Know Yourselves. You especially. iThank God For All oV Yu Even Though iCannot Understand Wat Manner Ov Madness Makes You Want 2be Friends Wit Me. I’m Glad 4 DMusic, DWords, My Sisters, DStories, DMovies, DBreasts,dVodka, DFriends,D Suffering & dSun.

So Out Wit D Old & iN Wit D New, For Ma Closing Line, iUSe tha Same Book By
-Charles Dickens’

 “iT iS aFar, Far Better Thing That iWill Do, Than iAv Eva Done; iT iS aFar, Far Better Season Dat iGo To Dan iAv Eva Knwn”
-Charles Dickens’
https://lawrenzo92.wordpress.com
Mip…

 

 

 

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Funmbi Lawrence Osayemi

I wrote this for Funmbi
The boy i could av been
Ï really wonder the kinda guy he could av been
I wonder the kinda music he would av liked maybe rock or Jazz…??
I wonder if Funmbi would av been a good Rapper or Footballer
Am wondering Would he av made the same choice I av made or gone another way and turn a different page
Would he like sunny days or rainy weather
Would he go to the bar wit his friends and get wasted or would he make a difference amongst his mates…
Dats all unlikely but you can never knw,it could av happened…
Would he be quick and active or kinda slow Mo…?
I would like to know cos i dnt knw i kinda hope tho that he was the faster in his class,the smartest in his class,and the kid that makes everybody laff ….

His he ganna be the gentle shy type that keeps to himself and loves quite times..If so then i am like him cos i am kinda gentle 2..
This whole thing gat ♍ƺ wondering , are ♍ƺ and Ʊ alike or we are 2 completely different people more like am Funmbi wit families and Lawrence wit friends
Cos av made some Choices and i wonder…..would Funmbi av made the same Choice…???

This are questions i would never find Ans to bt maybe if i was called Funmbi A lot would av Changed….
“WATS UP FUNMBI” My name is Lawrence I am You,ЧЯ my REAL name so i guess i am living a life of u…..
Although am NT called Funmbi we are still Pretty much the Same…..

MIP….

I’ve been at Joseph Ayo Babalola University for 2 years now…I didn’t realize how intense the course would be or how much I would have to put aside my entire life to get the most out of it and truly learn This time but I’m making it, and I’m doing it, and it looks like I’m finishing. That’s right. I’m not dropping out.

If you know a decent bit about me, you’ll know that I wasn’t tha smartest kid in college, Didt really do well in St. Gregory’s, Could Not keep up iN Unilag, then went to J.A.B.U, Me and my education haven’t exactly been in constant perfect harmony, and I’m not the kind of person who ‘sticks things out’ in order to finish at a dead end with wasted years, a certificate and a silly looking hat; I’d rather preoccupy myself with figuring out what I’m SUPPOSED to be doing.

So now I’m here, I should have graduated with a B.A in English Language, Mass Communication or Something in 2010, but lo and behold; I’m just finishing my 2nd year. I decided to write this because this weekend I actually ended up in the presence of a lot of people that went to my previous university (Unilag) at a friends party…

I got this instant joy and started smiling when I saw familiar faces of lovely people spread across,  I made sure I spoke to everyone I could

“Guy wats up?!” I’d say *smiling*.

“Yeah, really good! Just Tha Regular” They’d say *smiling*.

“You graduated now rite?” I’d Ask smilingly.

“Yeah man, long time (its just 3mnts ooh)….what are you doing?”

This is the point where the conversation would often get a little bit weird…some eyes would turn from smiling to awkwardly skeptical whilst I wondered how to approach that familiar-sounding question this time round. I go for providing a beautiful anti-climax by telling them ‘I’m in my second year’ about to get in tha third …….

Nd dey be like ……

…woah.

I have never seen a face sink so low. I worried for a moment that the sinking face was going to bury itself into the soil and grow a big tree; The Tree of Disappointment’.

But it didn’t…it didn’t go underground; it stayed fully present above the ground for everyone to sniff and stare at the mauve stench of disappointment it evoked. The cake and ice-cream I was having advised me to back away, return to my seat and finish eating and I obeyed like a child. But like an insecure adult, the shame of the disappointment stayed with me…I should av graduated by now. Probably be somewhere in the U.K, I should have been working nau already! On a fixed income, wearing suits, Shopping in Black and Blue. Have a flash ’10 reg car that I bought on finance and pay hundreds for it monthly simply because I KNOW I have a monthly income that can handle it. Driving around, In a stable relationship, Maybe even married.

However…I’m in my second/third year. I’ve not had a JOB cant av one yet sef! My income is as unpredictable as a child with Tourettes Syndrome. I wear skinny jean and Toms everyday prancing about like a prat. Like the words in Wiz Khalifa’s ‘Black & Yellow’…what was it? That’s it: “No keys (literally) PUSH (pedals) to start. As single as I was the day I was born. You know you’re in the crazy boi zone when you ask yourself that common question: ‘Can I just settle down for the rest of my life??’

But as I sat there, having my ice-cream and Eating away my Sadness, I had a summer epiphany; I’m exactly where I need to be, and I’m PROUD of myself! In fact; I’m gonna let rip right now!

I chase my dreams because I know my feet are quick and my brain is angling round the track after them like frickin Usain Bolts of Lightening. And I know what I’m doing, Even when I don’t know what I’m doing.

I’m doing stuff differently because I wasn’t born to be a statistic in any way shape or form and I’m basking in that!

And I’m NOT ashamed, you stupid potential Tree of Disappointment. What are you doing with your life? You’re just a frickin tree, you can’t even get up and go somewhere, dog.

If you haven’t had this epiphany yet, I hope you have yours soon…doesn’t matter where you are in life, dead end job, still in uni, doing a course you hate- Find your passion, THAT is your purpose. Finding your passion should be your priority right now…because if you don’t know what that is…I’m worried for you, you need to switch on whatever room that is in your brain that’s gone dark because you will die not having made the impact you were supposed to make on this earth.

And for those of you who have found your passion and that was in doing whatever the herd around you are doing..as long as your passionate about that..have fun!

Heard the lyrics of a song today by Bobby Brewer…these words in particular struck a chord with me, and I hope they do for you too:

 “Look at what you want, not at what you areAnything you do, let it come from you, then it will be new. Give us more to see. ~Alone With My Thoughts

##Mip.. cc: Birth Of A Poet©

03 July 2011….. 02:56am.

Adele – Someone Like You